ahh...~.~

Assalamualaikum..

almost a month! haha.. tought of discontinuing this blog oredi~
a month 2 go for final exam..adehh..tnsion-type headache menyerang!! huhu
still having fun even got plenty of probs 2 b solved..hv 2 move on ba..wut 2 wait for kn??
all probs wont stop me..hopefully..praying to Allah to help me facing evrything..
btw dont hv 2 remove d tonsil (for d time being lorh..) coz i still can bear with it..
wait til nex fever coming, then rethink bout it again.hahaha~
missing my parent so much!!~ owez d best raya ever (evrytime raya oso d best ma..)
still get duit raya..tot im oredi big enuff to stop getting it but im totally wrong..younger-looking kot..wahaha..perasan skit la...got lots of asgmt 2 b finished but still lazy to do it..OMG..this is madness!! (pinjam ayat sepet)
juz nk merepek since almost a month left dis blog w/o any latest post..quite boring to post anything since 2 much fun w/o internet..hahaha..sorry dowh..still needing d internet 4 asgmt..jgn majuk ye intenet ku syg..wek2..okla..chow dlu..

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

MAAF ZAHIR & BATIN

Salam..

no sigh~

im trying 2 fix my swollen tonsil but what i got is gastric!! very d very painful!! i cant fast as long as im on medication. bad!! worst!! ingat ni buy 1 free 1 penyakit ke?? haha..nice~

if i warded,plz sumbody come 2 d hosp n take a pic of me in hosp gown n post it in my blog?? can anybody?? haha..so sayang la hv 2 undergo surgery..never imagine of any like this in my life..if i cant talk after this, bear with me ya my frenz..coz i may not picking up ur calls anymore..redha..

wut happen 2 me???

feels like running away from everything!

hate every single thing in my life!

trying to rule out things that can make me smile but found nothing!

how could it be??

my tears r juz like d river..flowing without nobody can stop it!

hurt inside..torn apart..i was killed!

damn!!!

how much i hate myself now..nobody can ever imagine it!

i know how to laugh but i feel like sumbody need to teach me how to do it properly!

i want 2 sleep forever..!

i dont want 2 face anything anymore..!!

i want myself back!!

im losing it lil by lil..!

my strength..my faith..has gone!!

painful...!!

i cant stand it..!!

I'M SUCH A FAKE!!!!

done 4 today ~.~ wut a relief..

nothing today attract me..from early morning i juz wish i hv full strength to face d whole day..nothing causing me to b like this since i dunno wut happen to me..maybe i was juz unwell..maybe~ dat still could b d reason..hehe..sleepy..moody..gloomy..cheeky..still hv d mood 2 dance while listening to lagu raya..oopss..juz lurve 2 dance laa..hoho..

btw..berbuka wif mihun goreng..tasty!! thanx 2 sponsor..hikhik~ suddenly rethink about my course..feels like hating it..some part love it..but most of all..i dunno wut im doing rite now..lost of passion..ahh..how could it be..im not dat weak 2 give up for no reason..but im a loser to accept my weakness..HATE~

ok..what's next??

got up half an hour ago with headache..searching 4 my hp to turn off d alarm..saw few msgs..ok..fine..dunno shud i reply them now or not coz i hv 2 grab sumthing 4 my sahur..grab milk + koko crunch and ate it in front lappy..reading msgs on ym..frenz asking bout my condition since my status is 'demam' on ym list. my hand started 2 wander my neck..then..felt there's a swelling on my right side of neck..oh gosh..!! dunno wut izit n started 2 think negatively..yeay!! so scared!! H1N1 kah?? huish.. hopefully not but seriously my tonsil is swelling too!! and it is for d 3rd time in this year!! do i hv 2 remove it?? adoi..seriously i cant eat wif joy now since it feels like sumthing stucked in my throat!! painful..?? dont imagine it..so now..lets go solat Subuh!!!~